Decisions looking me in the face,

Sacs under the eyes,

Smoke, caffeinated stain teeth smiling back at me,

Coffee junkie, searching for the next twinkie,

Depression stained face,

Tear ducts cemented shut,

While I try to cry,

Shouting into the atmosphere,

Hitting wall after wall,

Full speed accident waiting to happen,

Where, when, why, what happened to me?

Unrecognized person standing staring back at me,

Hands reach through the mirror pulling me through,

Journying to imagined lands,

Visions assault me,

Fighting everyday just to make it,

Oh how did I let it get this bad,

Suddenly I’m back, flash back,

Fighting hunger and mass poverty in the desert,

Hundred forty degree sun beating down on my back,

Lifting box after box,

Sweating bucket after bucket,

Basic training didn’t prepare me for this,

Eternal sun tan, skin cancer sinking in,

Bomb threats, mop suits, gas masks taste like tear gas,

Fear sinks in the gut,

Riots in the city, gas prices too high,

Ramadan falls on the city,

All travel suspended,

Waking up I’m found fighting my sheets,

Sweat pouring out my skull,

Skin sunken into my eye wells,

Purple eyes, eternally black and blue,

As I waltz the dreams into the eternal blue,

Heaven’s gates open up for me,

Then close as purgatory sucks me in,

Living over and over and over,

The ground hog’s fantasy,

Seeing the dark eyes,

The children shitting on the street corners,

Bathing in the foul sewer filled ocean,

Wave after wave of brackish water,

Chewing khat just to stay normal,

People yelling into the sky,

Mental demons running rampent,

Dark skies envelope the city,

Dust storms settle in,

War is hell, living it is Satan’s pride and joy,

Hatred wells within,

Fear wells up inside,

The only water surrounded by my demons,

Thirsty I crawl towards the well,

Demons crawling out,

Reaching for me,

Dragging me in,

Drowning me,

I wake up,

Repenting my sins.