LOVE & LOW SELF ESTEEM

Open up my heart, Vulnerable, easily knocked down like dominos, Clip, clack, falling on the table, Open book, passive to your strategic movements, Enamored by your beauty, Opening up my heart, Eyes, examining me head to toe, Feeling vulnerable as your love washes over me, Defensive and sarcastic, Deflecting your compliments, Inside feeling special, but…

BIPOLAR HELL (A glimpse into uncontrolled symptoms)

(This poem is about how my bi-polar symptoms affected me before my doctors and I found the proper treatment for myself.) Tearing my heart out my chest, I look down into my hand, Beating heart, throbbing in time with my rage, Taking it out on myself, Raging in my thoughts, Destroying self, to be numb,…

A Good Day Blog

With how often I feel the pains of depression and anxiety I want to take this moment to acknowledge that today is a good day. I feel at peace, I have a bit of happiness, and I am enjoying the day. I don’t feel manic, I don’t feel like life is passing at a thousand…

ANXIETY 2

Worry is such a harsh master, It saddles anxiety and rides it hard, What little control worry offers, Yet I’m always quick to worry, Letting it wreck my soul And carve its way into my mind, Taking over and carrying me on a journey, Often with crashing into walls of blank anxiety.

ANXIETY

Last night I was hit with a huge anxiety episode. Stress of life in this pandemic world seems to hit like a wrecking ball from time to time. One string of hope that I hold onto is my faith. Its a light at the end of the tunnel, its also a light that currently exists…

PRACTICING CBT

Perception is a key used to unlock many thoughts. Especially, it unlocks how one perceives their own actions; future, past, present, and encourages a range of emotions. Those thoughts and emotions manifest themselves in numerous ways, rarely neutral, most of the time positive or negative. “I’m such a dork,” after bungling to flirt; or, “I…

MY EXPERIENCE ON SOCIAL MEDIA HAS BEEN ROTTEN

It has been two weeks since I logged into any social media account of mine and the freedom I feel is almost overwhelming me. I didn’t realize how entrapped I was in the social agendas. The negativity filter is slowly lifting from my mind. Somehow I got entangled in the drama, what did this social…

JOURNEY

Going this journey alone is becoming a swamp of no return Lost in the brush or stuck in the mud I become Each days journey never ending even when the sun winds down Endless hours toiled with no harvest from the soil Empty promises shrill in empty ears and hallow halls Eyes sunken and shallow,…

(ABC)’S OF CBT

This is a fictional work through of the ABC. The idea was brought up during my CBT group. This is my take of how to use CBT for myself. I understand there are minor differences, even an error here or there, but I’m learning & blogging this so I can see where I was 5…

SETTING GOALS TO COMBAT MELANCHOLY

Melancholy is by far the worst emotion I’ve felt other than grief. Recently I’ve started to attend another Cognitive Behavior Therapy group. Our first homework assignment was to write down how depression has affected our lives and to set five goals we would like to see our treatment help with. Goals: To improve and increase…